A Simple Approach to Prayer

The best prayer I ever heard was two words: “Help me.”

It was not eloquent. It wasn’t flowing. It wasn’t lengthy, poetic or selfless. But it was brutally honest. And painfully sincere. That prayer came from a deeply broken place, uttered by a friend who, in those two simple words, admitted the mess he’d made of his life and acknowledged he couldn’t fix it on his own.

In the forty-two years I’ve been building my relationship with God, I’ve said countless thousands of prayers. I’ve prayed alone, in pairs, in small groups and, in my former role as a music pastor, in front of thousands of people. I’ve attended conferences on prayer, read books on prayer, been on committees discussing prayer, taught classes on prayer and personally used a wide variety of prayer techniques like centering prayer, breath prayer, lectio divina and praying scripture. If there’s anyone who should not struggle with prayer, it’s me.

But I do sometimes (as described in my last post). When I feel stymied, stagnant or bored with my conversations with God, I think about my friend’s two word prayer. It reminds me that an effective prayer life isn’t about techniques or theological depth or impressive language. Life-giving prayer is simple. Organic. Authentic. Raw.

That said, using a basic framework during my set time of prayer (as opposed to my many spontaneous prayers throughout the day) helps keep things balanced. It provides enough structure to keep me from getting stuck, while allowing enough freedom to keep my prayers fresh.

Of all the prayer techniques I’ve learned, the one I use most often is one of the simplest. It’s an acronym of the word PRAY:

P – Praise

I start by thanking God for who God is (creator, provider, guide, mother, father, lord, friend, etc.) and what God has done for me (the good things in my life). Beginning with gratitude helps realign my perspective and puts me in a healthy mental place for the prayers that follow.

R – Repent

Repent literally means ‘to turn.’ It’s both acknowledging that I’ve gone in a wrong direction and taking action to correct my course. I believe I’m a wonderful yet flawed person, one who makes plenty of mistakes. I am sometimes insecure, self-centered, lustful, judgmental, ungrateful, entitled and addicted to my own comfort. Acknowledging those faults to myself and to God keeps me humble, reminds me to be more gracious with the faults of others and motivates me to grow.

A – Ask

I ask God to help others. My family and friends. Strangers I hear about. Situations of significance. I ask God to protect, to heal, to comfort, to guide, to encourage, to strengthen, to provide. I ask for God’s blessing and help in their lives.

Y – Yourself

I close by praying for myself. This section is last for a reason. After starting in gratitude, admitting my flaws and focusing on the needs of others, I’m usually in a good head space to think about myself. To remember what I actually need, what I truly want and what’s really important.

The beauty of this simple framework for prayer is that you can do it anywhere—in the car, at lunch, during a commercial, in a quiet room—and for any length of time, from a handful of seconds to hours on end. After forty-two years, it still serves me well.

So how about you? Do you have a desire to pray? Do you struggle as I have? Try this simple acronym. Start small. Keep it simple. Be brutally honest (God can take it). Be yourself. Stick with it. Have fun. If you do, you’ll find some peace, hope and comfort as you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.