What Comes After Thanksgiving? A Helpful Holiday Perspective

What comes after Thanksgiving?

That’s the question recently posed by my dear friend and fellow writer Susan Rau Stocker in her wonderful blog The Many Faces of PTSD. Her insightful answer below gave me a much needed perspective now that the holiday season is in full swing. I hope it increases your enjoyment of the holidays as you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

What comes after Thanksgiving?

I know: We’re tempted to say Christmas. But Christmas is a month away, and here we are at the end of November, “the gray month,” with more than we can possibly get done between now and December 25th. So, what comes after Thanksgiving? STRESS. WORRY. AGGRAVATION. SPENDING. COMPARING OURSELVES TO OTHERS. TV SHOWS AND ADS OF PERFECT COUPLES, PERFECT FAMILIES, PERFECT HOMES, PERFECT VACATIONS, PERFECT CHRISTMAS TREES AND . . . RELAXED PEOPLE.

I don’t know about you, but I’m thinking more along the lines of the Grinch. This seems like a great time of year to take the dog and head off for the hills. “Come on, Max. We’ll be back in March. Maybe April.”

It’s not that I don’t love Christmas. I do love Christmas. I just don’t love what’s happened to it. Actually, it’s the same thing that has happened to weddings, funerals, birthdays, homes, cars, clothes and so much else. Everything seems to have out-grown itself. Almost everything is super-sized and as inflated as a balloon. Almost nothing has retained its meaning and simplicity.

How can we keep our heads about us in the midst of “holiday” rage? Road rage is only the beginning of the ways stress zaps our kindness to each other. Does it seem to you that most of life has become competitive instead of cooperative?

So, how do we keep it simple and real while those around us are in a race for the greatest and best, the snazziest and most elegant, the flashiest and finest? And do we need reasons to concentrate on simplicity? I know a pervasive, underlying reason: good health — mental, physical, psychological, and spiritual.

We need to disengage from the racing subway where we’re holding on to the straps for dear life. We need to sit on the mountaintop, if only in our imaginations, and stare out at the cosmos. We need to remember how little we are and how big the world is. When we look across the ocean or the mountains or the star-studded sky, why do we feel so much better? Because we regain our perspective. All is well. God’s in Her/His/Their Heaven. I have a deck of “Angel Cards” and one of them says: “”God keeps all the planets in the sky. Surely God is holding you, too.” I LOVE that thought. I guess if Jupiter and Mars are hanging in orbit, we humans can stay in our lanes, also.

What comes after Thanksgiving? A chance to re-position ourselves in a sane, safe, sweet, simple life we re-create, re-new, and rejoice in. Love, Susan

Susan Stocker is a blogger, novelist, and Marriage and Family Therapist with Masters degrees in Communication and Counseling. She served as a mental health ambassador to China in 1998 and has volunteered with the Alzheimer’s Association, American Cancer Society, and many other organizations. Her published works include Only Her Naked Courage (2013), Heart 1.5 (2013), The Many Faces of Anxiety (2013), The Many Faces of PTSD (2010), and Heart (1981), as well as her blog The Many Faces of PTSD (manyfacesofptsd.wordpress.com). She is on a lifelong journey toward Becoming Herself. You can contact her at sraustocker@yahoo.com.