The clock read 2:07 AM.
I rolled over and tried to sleep, but the whirling thoughts wouldn’t stop. At 3:15, I gave up and went to my chair in the living room.
My dream of being a published author is inching ever closer to reality (my first books come out May 9; you can learn about them here). But along with the excitement has come pressure and worry. Writing a book and having it traditionally published is only half the battle—getting people to know about it and want to buy it is the other. I could write the greatest book in the world, but if sales flop, publishers will be hesitant to work with me again, and my dream of having an author career will slip through my fingers like smoke.
So I couldn’t sleep. Have I done enough to build buzz? What new marketing strategy should I try? Do I have enough social media followers? What else can I add to my already crushing to-do list? The questions swirled in my mind, leaving me feeling overwhelmed and defeated.
Sitting in the dark, I opened my laptop and wrote down some new ideas, then made lists of large, medium, and small tasks, both for promoting my books and my personal life. When my wife got up, I told her how I was feeling. She gave me a hug and helped me see which things on my list were unnecessary and which could wait. Then I spent time praying and meditating. Those things helped clear my mind and made me feel calmer.
But this post isn’t about giving you tips on overcoming this situation in your own life. I’m writing to say this—when you chase a big dream that you’re passionate about, these moments are inevitable. It’s just part of it. That’s tough for me to admit. I like to think that I can use my hard-won collection of personal development tools and techniques to prevent myself from feeling like this. I can’t. Pitfalls and roadblocks are part of the journey. While that’s a hard truth, there’s a comfort in it. Embracing that reality helps me be more prepared and feel less like a failure when these unwelcome emotions come knocking.
So if you find yourself feeling anxious and overwhelmed, know that you’re not alone. Write things down. Make a plan. Talk honestly with someone you trust. Meditate. If you have a spiritual bent, pray. Then let yourself off the hook. Remember these feelings are normal, and, as long as you make healthy choices, they will pass. If you do, you’ll be that much closer to achieving your dream, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
