Recently I woke up to this view from my apartment’s balcony:
Two hours later, it looked like this:
What caused the dramatic change? The sun. It rose above a cloud bank and burned away the fog.
It felt like a metaphor for my life. Sometimes I find myself in seasons of struggle, confusion, or disappointment where I feel surrounded by fog, unable to see the way ahead or understand what’s happening to me. No matter how hard I strain or squint, I can’t see my way through. I need an outside source, a “sun”, to burn the fog away, to help me find clarity and direction.
In those seasons, the outside source I’ve found most helpful is God. I know that’s a non-starter for some of you, or that you may have a different name for your higher power. I respect that. I’m just stating that in my experience, God has been a better “fog burning” source than anything else I’ve tried. Better than parents or friends or therapists. Better than teachers or gurus or my own gut instinct. Better than self-help books or podcasts or blog posts. Those are all wonderful things but when taken as ends in themselves, each has their limitations.
Yet when God is the lens through which I see the world, and I turn to those other sources in the context of seeking God first, they are often the very ways in which I receive the direction and guidance I need. Somehow, apart from that perspective, those things aren’t as helpful to me. If that sounds mysterious or counterintuitive, I guess I’d say… it is. But I’ve learned to be okay with embracing the mystery.
What I’m really trying to say is this – putting in the effort to seek a relationship with God and learn to hear Her direction, in whatever form, has been the best solution I’ve found to finding my way through the fog of life.
So how about you? How do you find direction? What cuts through the fog in your life? What outside source acts as your “sun”? What skill or relationship or practice can you invest in now to help you better connect with that source? Make the effort. When the next fog bank rolls in, you’ll be glad you did. And you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
In the spirit of the holidays, this is part 2 of a story I originally posted in November of 2017 that reminds us that our inner child still has lessons to teach…
Then I saw it. Fifteen feet farther down the slope, I could just make out a glow coming from beneath a bush. The upward angle of Lisa’s vantage point gave her the illusion that I had reached our ghost when I was really above it. I made my way toward the mysterious light as quickly as I dared, my wounded ankle reminding me of the price of haste.
In honor of the kid inside all of us who longs to come out at Christmas, I decided to repost a story I originally shared in October of 2017. May it inspire your inner 10 year old this holiday!
I asked my wife, Lisa, to come out, and with the aid of binoculars, we watched it dim and brighten, swirl and pulse in a seemingly random pattern. For fifteen minutes, we observed it, trying to come up with every possible rational explanation. It wasn’t the reflected light of a headlight or a swimming pool. It wasn’t landscape lighting from a backyard. It wasn’t a white cloth fluttering in the breeze reflecting moonlight. Our best guess was that it was a light-up dog toy that a hiker tossed to their pet up on the hill. Maybe it went over the edge and got lodged on the slope. Eventually we went to bed, still wondering.
In that moment, wearing pajamas, standing in the dark, my head still fuzzy from sleep, I asked myself a question – should I go investigate? An internal tug-of-war began between my current 48-year-old self and my former 10-year-old self. 48’s argument went something like this:
Happiness is an elusive goal. I usually find it when I’m chasing other things. I’m not saying that a key to happiness is to do EVERYTHING that would make my 10-year-old self proud (Oreo pizza a la mode for dinner anyone?). But for me, this challenge is a good one. I too easily default to the “shoulds” in my life. The grown-up responsibilities. The expected. The practical. When I was 10, I wanted to chase ghosts. I wanted to write a book. A spooky, mystery-adventure book. In honor of my childhood self, I just chased a ghost. I’ve also started that book. I’m on chapter 22 and having a ball. I’ll let you know when I’m done.