I got a phone call from my sister the other day. We had a long, wide-ranging conversation about everything from the challenges of raising teenagers to how to have a relationship with God. Several times during the call, I suggested books that had helped me in a few of the areas we were discussing. She seemed genuinely interested in hearing about them.
With that in mind, I thought I’d use this post to share some books and websites that have helped me become a better version of myself. I hope they can be an inspiration and a catalyst for growth in your own life. Here are some of my favorites in various categories:
CAREER: The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna – an easy read that uses colorful pictures and engaging graphics to communicate concepts. This book helps you find your true passions, then goes on to show how to turn them into a career by differentiating our “should do’s” from our “must do’s”.
HABITS: Daily Rituals: How Artists Work by Mason Currey – this fascinating book is made up of short entries on the lives and daily habits of over 150 successful people from a variety of creative fields. It gave me so many useful tips on how to practically organize and live out each day for both productivity and enjoyment.
PHYSICAL: Cholesterol Clarity by Jimmy Moore – this book helped me understand the latest science on cholesterol, diet and overall heart health; kennedypm.com – a fun, engaging blog full of nutritional insight, easy recipes and beautiful photography (full disclosure – this is my daughter’s website and yes, she’s awesome 🙂 ).
SPIRITUAL: Walking With God by John Eldredge – this book helped me deepen my personal experience of God by showing how an intimate, conversational relationship with God is possible; Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis – this classic work from a master writer provides an intellectual foundation for a belief in God and a Christian worldview.
FINANCIAL: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver – this 23 minute episode on financial planning had me laughing out loud yet was the gut punch I needed to start educating myself on finances and retirement; The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey – a clear, easy to follow method for finding freedom from financial stress by one of America’s most trusted names in financial advice; Money: Master the Game by Tony Robbins – if you read Dave Ramsey and are interested in upping your financial knowledge even higher, this book is a more in depth look at investing for your future. It’s packed with interviews with the most successful investors in the world and delivered with Tony’s well known motivational style.
MENTAL: lumosity.com – a free website where you play fun, short games designed to exercise your brain, a key to warding off the mental decline that comes with advancing age; Words I Wish I Wrote by Robert Fulghum – a collection of moving, motivating, and thought provoking excerpts from many of the top writers in history that inspired Fulghum’s own classic “Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten”. Organized by category for easy reference, this is a gem I’ve turned to again and again to shape my thinking about life and my place in it.
SERVING: volunteermatch.org – a great website that allows you to search for volunteer opportunities in your area based on your skills and interests. I’ve used it to volunteer with a wide variety of wonderful organizations.
GIVING: charitynavigator.org – this website provides a way to give to the needs of the world with confidence by ranking charitable organizations on their financial trustworthiness and effectiveness.
I’m SO grateful for the guidance and insight these writers and resources have given me. Choose one that looks interesting to you and dive in! If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
Have any favorite resources of your own that you’d like to share? I’d love to hear about them! List them in the comments below.
I was sitting on a bench at Denison College in Ohio when it happened. I had just finished my run and was waiting to walk my daughter to her play rehearsal when a loud, cheery voice called out, “Good morning! How are you?” Startled, I looked up and saw a groundskeeper in an orange vest, trash stick in hand. He was staring right at me with a big smile on his face. From the articulation of his words and some of his facial features, I realized that he was a person with an intellectual disability. I stumbled out what I hope was an appropriate response and he moved on.
As I sat on the bench and reflected on that encounter, I started asking myself some hard questions: Why aren’t I more like that? More unabashedly friendly? Why am I not that happy? If he’s the one with a disability, why is his outlook on life so positive?
In that moment, I was reminded of how big an impact the attitude I choose has on my happiness. The way I decide to look at life, regardless of my circumstances, will largely determine my enjoyment of it. I’ve seen it clearly in others – some people with health, wealth, friends, and family who are stressed and bitter while others dealing with illness, poverty, and loss shine with joy and hope.
I’m not advocating denying our pain and struggles. Some of us face incredible hardships or are in a season of spirit-crushing trials. Neither “put on a happy face” or “don’t worry, be happy” is a magic elixir for contentment. But, no matter what our circumstances, we do have the ability to chose our attitude. The power to see our difficulties as insurmountable joy-killers or real opportunities for personal growth is ours to wield.
We all have challenges in life that threaten our experience of joy, things that will either make us bitter or make us better. The attitude we choose to take toward these challenges will greatly determine if we feel stressed and defeated or peaceful and hopeful. Choose well today. Be grateful. Notice beauty. Show kindness. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
STEP 1: PICK YOUR PASSION – Make sure the change you’re considering is truly something you’re passionate about. It’s easy to fall into the “I should make this change” trap. “I should read more / exercise / loose weight / go to church,” etc. All of those things are great but if your motivation for doing them is really outside pressure then your likelihood of following through is low. Choose a goal about which you can honestly say “I want to make this change.” The odds of you sticking with it when the going gets tough is much higher.
STEP 2: FIND YOUR FOCUS – As admirable as it may be to say “I’m going to loose weight, volunteer at a charity, clean and organize my house, get out of debt, take up painting and end world hunger this year!”, it’s probably not going to happen. The best way to lasting, positive change is to pick just one or two areas that you really want to focus on. If you knock them out early and have the motivation for additional goals later in the year, awesome! You can always add them then.
STEP 3: SET YOUR STRATEGY – Achieving a meaningful goal, even one that you’re passionate about and focused on, can still be a daunting challenge. One great way to make it less overwhelming is to break it into small steps. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Now that you’ve identified your elephant with steps 1 and 2, take a few minutes to make your bite plan. Start with the simple parts (the tail) and let the celebration of those small victories feed your motivation to tackle slightly bigger bites (the legs). By the time you reach the big sections (the body), you’ll be rolling with confidence!
STEP 1: PICKING MY PASSION – An issue I’ve been passionate about for many years is homelessness. There’s a lot of worthy causes out there but for some reason this one has consistently hit my heart. I want to do something this year to help people who are homeless. I’ve chosen a clear passion.
STEP 2: FINDING MY FOCUS – This one is tough for me because I like to work on improving a lot of different aspects of my life simultaneously. But, along with some “next step” goals from things I focused on last year (getting an agent for my recently finished first novel and continuing to conquer my inner pack rat by decluttering), I’m choosing to concentrate on finding a way to help those struggling with homelessness in my new part-time city of Sacramento (my wife Lisa and I are doing a one year experiment this year of living part-time at our house in Mesa, AZ and part-time in an apartment in Sacramento, CA near our son).
STEP 3: SETTING MY STRATEGY – Homelessness is a big problem in Sacramento. I see people without a place to live virtually everyday. I often feel so unequipped to make any significant difference in such an elephant of a cause. Here’s how I’m attempting to break my goal down into manageable bites:
So how about it? How would you apply these steps to your goals this year? I’d love for you to share your plans in the comment section below. Give these 3 simple steps a try. If you do, you’ll take another big step toward Becoming Yourself.