I read the text and burst into tears.
The day after Christmas, Iād woken up with a scratchy throat and a fever. I got progressively worse and went to a drive-through testing site. Later that day, I got the results. After being fully vaccinated, boosted and wearing a mask inside public places, Iād still somehow contracted Covid-19.
I didnāt cry because Iād finally caught the disease Iād been dodging for almost two years. And thanks to the vaccines, I wasnāt worried about landing in the hospital or dying. I was crushed because we were three days away from our family holiday gathering with our kids.
Both our son and daughter spent Christmas with their in-laws this year, with our family slated to spend New Yearās weekend together. The six of us all being in the same place is a rare occurrence, and each one is my favorite time of the year by a mile. Now, like so many other families this year, my Covid diagnosis had just blown that cherished occasion out of the water.

Here are some things I learned from that bitter disappointment:
1. Let yourself feel it.
Disappointments are painful. Pretending otherwise doesnāt help anyone. As my dear friend and accountability partner often reminds me in hard times, āYouāve gotta let yourself feel the feels.ā And while itās good perspective to remember that others have it far worse, that doesnāt negate your pain. Just because someone else has cancer doesnāt mean your broken leg doesnāt hurt. Thatās why I let myself cry and express my sorrow to my wife and kids.
2. Is this a dream destroyed or a dream delayed?
After letting myself absorb the crushing news and talking it through with my wife, I called my kids. They were not only supportive and understanding, but let me know we could reschedule for a couple of weeks later. While still disappointing, the sting was much less when I learned I just had to wait a little longer.

3. Are there any hidden benefits to the change?
Often youāre unable to see any unexpected benefits to a disappointment, at least not until time has passed. But sometimes you can find them even in the short term. My wife pointed out that if we had done our family celebration on Christmas Day and my pre-gathering test came up negative, I would have unknowingly put everyone at risk. I felt a huge relief knowing that didnāt happen.
4. Let it go.
My wife used to be a realtor and often put in countless hours with a client only to have them decide not to buy or worse yet, purchase a for-sale-by-owner home. Both instances meant she didnāt get paid. When that happened, her real estate broker gave her sage advice that sheās lived by ever since: āLet yourself feel bad for five minutes, then say āWhatās next?āā Clinging to bitter disappointment doesnāt change the reality of itāit only lengthens its negative impact.
Disappointment is inevitable. How you respond to it is up to you. Let yourself āfeel the feels.ā See if itās a defeat or a delay. Search out any hidden benefits or hard-won lessons. Then let it go and move on. If you do, youāll soften lifeās stings and take another step toward Becoming Yourself.




