There’s a bizarre character in the M. Night Shyamalan movie Lady in the Water. He’s a bodybuilder who only works out one half of his body. As you would suspect, he looks like a young Arnold Schwarzenegger on one side and Pee-wee Herman on the other.
I rightly laugh at that ridiculous picture, but how often have I taken the same approach in my own personal development routine? I may work hard to expand my mind but ignore my body. Or be in peak physical shape but neglect the health of my soul.
I think a foundational building block of personal development is balance. I’m not saying that every area of my life is of equal importance. For example, I’d rather be emotionally healthy with average intelligence than a depressed genius. That said, I believe working on myself as a whole will yield more satisfying results than a hit or miss approach.
So what are the areas of my life that I should be paying attention to? The answer to that question may vary depending on the person, but here are the top 5 areas that I monitor in my own life (in no particular order):
1. Physical health – eating right, regular exercise, getting enough sleep (for more see my Temple Health post here)
2. Mental health – playing brain games at lumosity.com, reading challenging material, thinking critically on important issues
3. Emotional health – watching movies, playing music, expressing creativity, taking a weekly Sabbath
4. Relational health – time with family and friends, meeting new people
5. Spiritual health – prayer, silence and solitude, time in nature, appreciating beauty
There are also what I call “second tier” areas that, while not as important as my top 5, still merit attention:
1. Financial health – giving to causes I believe in, saving for the short term & retirement, staying out of debt, enjoyment spending
2. Occupational health – having a meaningful career that I enjoy, having an appropriate work / life balance
3. Organizational health – effective time management, a balanced & sustainable schedule, a decluttered home
When I’m feeling depressed, grumpy, stressed or generally out of whack, I try to step back and do a quick mental review of these areas. It’s usually pretty easy to see which ones are out of balance and need a little TLC. Having this checklist not only helps me find a way out of my funk, it gives me a gauge to measure my progress on my personal development goals. It helps me become a better version of myself.
How about you? Which of these areas are feeling out of balance in your life? Choose one simple thing you can do in those specific areas to give them some attention. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
For most of my life I’ve felt like I wasn’t doing enough. Not giving enough money to charities. Not spending enough time developing relationships. Not doing enough to serve others. Not working enough on my own heath and well-being. Every TV commercial showing a child in need made me feel guilty. Every article about diet, exercise or sleep habits made me feel like I was failing. Every book on relationships made me feel like I was falling short of being a good husband, father, friend, or neighbor.
These feelings led me to ask some hard questions: how do I balance all the competing demands in my life? How do I choose to live in a world where there is so much need? How do I spend my time, energy, and money? I felt overwhelmed by the “should do” lists in my life.
2. FINANCIAL – I will fund my retirement plan and give at least 10% of my income to charities I believe in.
4. SPIRITUAL – I will spend 45-60 minutes praying / reading / meditating / hanging out with God 6 mornings a week.
5. SERVING OTHERS – I will volunteer 1-2x per month at 
I’ve found that having a simple Rule of Life frees me from a lot of stress and guilt. Sometimes things that aren’t on my list come up that I feel I need to do. That’s ok. And when circumstances in my life change, I update my Rule. But having this baseline has made me happier, more peaceful, and more productive.
In honor of Thanksgiving week, I want to share a simple, quick practice I’ve developed over the years that helps me be happy. It’s a way to put my mind on a positive track vs. dwelling on the inevitable frustrations, difficulties and disappointments that life throws my way. Here it is:
2. ANOTHER DAY – I have a neighbor who says “Every day above ground is a good one.” He has a point. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Be thankful for the gift of another 24 hours and the opportunity for a fresh start.
What would you add to this list? Make it personal and be creative. If you’re chasing happiness, try working these 1 minute wonders into your morning and evening routine. If you do, you’ll take another simple step toward Becoming Yourself.