What is the difference between a talent and a gift?
I’d never clearly thought about the distinction, but the following excerpt from author and speaker Henri Nouwen resonates with me. It’s also incredibly encouraging. So often, I feel like my talents fail me or aren’t enough to meet a need or accomplish a goal. Knowing in those moments that I still have gifts to bring is gratifying.
This concept also opens my eyes to the value and contributions of others that I often overlook. I hope this simple yet profound idea helps you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
More important than our talents are our gifts. We may have only a few talents, but we have many gifts. Our gifts are the many ways in which we express our humanity. They are part of who we are: friendship, kindness, patience, joy, peace, forgiveness, gentleness, love, hope, trust, and many others. These are the true gifts we have to offer to each other.
Somehow I have known this for a long time, especially through my personal experience of the enormous healing power of these gifts. But since my coming to live in a community with mentally handicapped people, I have rediscovered this simple truth. Few, if any, of those people have talents they can boast of. Few are able to make contributions to our society that allow them to earn money, compete on the open market, or win awards. But how splendid are their gifts!
Those of you that know me from this blog read my vegetable writing—healthy, nourishing, and helpful for growth (hopefully).
But I make my living with my candy writing. I write books for kids, specifically a spooky monster mystery series called Monsterious.
Monsterious books are short, and as each is a stand alone adventure with a unique cast of characters, they can be read in any order. They’re a good fit for fans of Goosebumps, Stranger Things, and Five Nights at Freddy’s, if those franchises mean anything to you. While Monsterious is targeted for eight to twelve year olds, I write them in such a way that they can be enjoyed by anyone who loves a fast-paced spooky thriller with lots of action, humor, and heart.
Why am I telling you all this? For two simple reasons:
1. In case you’re interested in the books
2. In case you’d like to support my writing
I’ve always written this blog for free with no advertising. It’s a way for me to share my personal development journey in hopes that it helps others with theirs. If you’ve enjoyed this blog and want to support it, buying my books for yourself or for others is a great way to do that. I’m in the crucial early stage of my book publishing career where finding an audience is so important. Book sales are what convince my publisher (Penguin Random House) to continue the series, so I can make a living as an author.
If you’re still reading this and want to know what my books are about, here’s a quick peek:
ESCAPE FROM GRIMSTONE MANOR – Three friends are trapped overnight in a haunted house amusement park ride and discover the monsters are real.
THE SNATCHER OF RAVEN HOLLOW – Two friends learn that a monster is responsible for the disappearance of babies in their small town, but no one believes them.
TERROR IN SHADOW CANYON – Five hikers lost in a remote wilderness are stalked by a monster.
More info and buy links for these books are at MattMcMann.com.
Thanks so much for allowing me to share the other half of my writing mind with you. Next week I’ll be back with another serving of vegetables. In the meantime, I hope you’ll enjoy the candy as you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
In last week’s post, I shared the writings of Richard Rohr on how recognizing our false selves can bring peace. This week, I wanted to share a follow up post in which he explains the benefits of taking the next step—releasing our false selves. This concept has been so helpful to me that I wanted to share it with you. I hope it aids you on your journey to Becoming Yourself.
Father Richard further clarifies what he means by the false self:
Our false self is not our bad self, our inherently deceitful self, the self that God does not like, or we should not like. Actually, our false self is good and necessary as far as it goes. It just doesn’t go far enough, and it often poses and thus substitutes for the real thing. That is its only problem, and that is why it’s called “false.”
Various false selves (temporary costumes) are necessary to get us all started, and they show their limitations when they stay around too long. If a person keeps growing, their various false selves usually die in exposure to greater light.
Our false self, which we might also call our “small self” or “separate self,” is our launching pad: our body image, our job, our education, our clothes, our money, our car, our success, and so on. These are the functional trappings of ego that we all use to get through an ordinary day. They are largely projections of our self-image and our attachment to it. [1]
Contemplation teaches us how to detach from this self-image. For example, I’m happy to dress as a priest at the appropriate time and place, but I don’t do it all the time, because then I get too attached to that image. Any self-image, positive or negative, held too tightly, reinforces our attachment to the false self. We don’t need to think of ourselves as better or worse than each other. I am who I am as the image of God and that levels the playing field. [2]
When we are able to move beyond our separate or false self—as we are invited to do over the course of our lives—it will eventually feel as if we have lost nothing.In fact, it will feel like freedom and liberation. When we are connected to the Whole, we no longer need to protect or defend the mere part. We no longer need to compare and compete. We are now connected to something inexhaustible.
To not let go of our false self at the right time and in the right way is precisely what it means to be stuck, trapped, and addicted to our self. (The traditional word for that was sin, the result of feeling separate from the Whole.) Discovering our True Self is not just a matter of chronological age. Some spiritually precocious children see through the false self rather early. Some old men and old women are still dressing it up. If all we have at the end of our life is our separate or false self, there will not be much to eternalize. It is transitory and impermanent. These costumes are largely created by the mental ego. They were useful to us in our development. Our false self is what changes, passes, and dies when we die. Only our True Self lives forever. [3]
