Becoming Yourself

Developing a Better You

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Realize Your Dream with S.M.A.R.T. Goals (Part 2)

January 21, 2023 / / 0 Comments

I recently came across this post I originally published April 16, 2022. As January is a time for reflection and goal setting for many of us, I’m sharing it again in hopes that it helps you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

A goal without a plan is only a dream.

Brian Tracy

In my last post, I told the story of my author dream and the goals I set to help it become a reality.

How can you set effective goals for your dream? Here are some helpful tips I learned from the Book Marketing Simplified podcast on making S.M.A.R.T. goals. A S.M.A.R.T. goal is:

Specific Measurable Achievable Relevant Timely

Specific

Dreams are spacious and often vague. Goals are sharp and clear. Determine thoughtful, reasoned actions that will maximize your efforts and move you in the desired direction. The fact that my four writing goals were focused and sequential helped me stay on course and persevere.

Measurable 

Establish definable metrics so you know if you’ve reached your goal or not. One of my measurable goals was “Complete the rough draft of a full-length book” vs. the indefinable “Do some writing.” I knew I had met this goal when I wrote “The End.”

Achievable

While having a big dream is wonderful, having unrealistic goals is not. Smaller, realistic goals will give you observable progress and keep you motivated. One of my achievable goals was “Get any book deal” vs. “Get a huge advance plus a movie deal.”

Relevant

Make sure each goal is in direct service to your dream. Other good ideas or passions might pop up during this process. Set aside those that lead you off the path. You can revisit them later. I considered music goals while pursing my writing goals, but saying no to them helped me focus.

Timely

If your goals have no end date, you’re far less likely to achieve them. Having a deadline provides motivation. Even if you don’t meet it, a timeline helps you reevaluate and make revisions for the future. For me, this was giving myself twelve months to meet my first income goal.

Photo by Etienne Girardet on Unsplash

So which dream are you ready to pursue? What are three S.M.A.R.T. goals you can make right now to help you realize that dream? Make them Specific. Make them Measurable. Make them Achievable. Make them Relevant. Make them Timely. If you do, your dream will be another step closer to reality, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

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Realize Your Dreams with S.M.A.R.T. Goals (Part 1)

January 14, 2023 / / 0 Comments

I recently came across this post I originally published April 9, 2022. Given that January is time for reflection and goal setting for many of us, I thought I’d share it again in hopes that it helps you take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

I’ve dreamed of being an author since I was a kid.

The creative outlet. Having people enjoy my stories. Being my own boss. Having a flexible schedule. Making a difference in people’s lives.

For forty years that remained just a dream. Why? Because I never made any goals to bring that dream to life. A dream is only a destination. Goals are a roadmap to get you there.

When I was finally ready to take my author dream seriously, I made four goals:

1. Write a book.

This was something I’d never done before. Go from Chapter One until The End. Just finish, even if no one ever read it.

2. Get an agent.

Have a literary professional believe in me and my book enough to represent me.

3. Get a book deal.

Any book deal. From anybody. For any amount of money.

4. Make a living wage from writing for one year.

This was not so much about the money, but what it signifies—that a publisher and readers invested enough in my books to support me for a year.

Photo by Patrick Fore on Unsplash

I set those goals five years ago. I’m thrilled and a little stunned that I have achieved them all. Now I’m moving on to new goals, like having my debut series (the first two books publish May 9, 2023 and you can learn about them here) sell well enough that my publisher wants additional books, and being able to earn a living wage as an author for five consecutive years.

Making effective goals can feel overwhelming. I recently listened to a really helpful Book Marketing Simplified podcast on setting S.M.A.R.T. goals. In my next post, I’ll share some tips on how to apply that wisdom to your dream. Until then, decide what dream you’re ready to work on. If you do, you’ll be on your way to making it a reality, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

Why I Hate New Year’s Resolutions (and What I Do Instead)

December 31, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I hate New Year’s resolutions. 

As someone who has been dedicated to personal development for decades, that may sound surprising. If they are helpful for you, wonderful. Embrace them. For me, an external date on the calendar has never provided enough motivation for me to stick to my goals. The annual cycle of failure only succeeded in making me feel bad about myself.

In order to change something meaningful about my life, the motivation has to come from within. I have to want it badly enough to go through the inevitable pain of change. The problem for me is summed up in this quote:

The reinvention of daily life means marching off the edge of our maps.

Bob black

My love of routine and timid nature make reinventing myself a struggle. I like my map. I’m comfortable with my map. It’s neat and predictable and familiar. I have a sense of control, however illusionary that actually is.

Venturing beyond the edges of my map means traveling to frightening places, filled with strange and wild things. It’s messy, unpredictable, unfamiliar, and potentially dangerous. As Bilbo Baggins once said of such adventures, “Nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things. Make you late for dinner!”

So my desire for comfortable routine is at odds with my desire for personal development. Becoming the best mental, emotional, and spiritual version of myself requires that I take up my walking stick and step boldly over my familiar borders.

To find my courage, I must remember that the best things in my life came to me when I dared to enter the unknown—my marriage. My kids. My career as a musician and now as a writer. My relationship with God. My travels and life-giving friendships. I enjoy these most precious things at their current health and depth only because of the times I chose to march off the edge of my map.

There have been many failures along the way. Countless times, I’ve been too fearful or too comfortable to risk the journey. Sometimes I’ve taken the risk only to wander into swamps, lose my way in a misty forest, or wind up adrift on a stormy sea. Marching off the edge of our maps is not for the faint of heart. But that is where True Life lies. Energy. Adventure. Meaning. Wonder. A sense of being alive that’s found nowhere else.

What are your growth goals for the new year? Are they mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, relational, or something else? Whatever they may be, if you truly want to reinvent your life, you must be willing to march of the edge of your map. Read new things. Talk with different people. Visit untried places. Start unfamiliar ventures. If you do, an incredible adventure awaits, and you’ll take a giant leap toward Becoming Yourself.

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