Becoming Yourself

Developing a Better You

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The Life-Changing Power of Choosing Gratitude

Simple wisdom is often the best.

When I read the words of Lakota author and activist Doug Good Feather, I was struck not by their originality but by their poetic clarity. His insights on choosing gratitude felt fresh and compelling, reminding me of the transformative power that single decision can have on my life and the lives of those around me.

Let his words encourage you to make gratitude an intentional habit. If you do, you’ll enjoy a sweeter life, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

Each and every morning offers us a chance to start anew, fresh, and to begin again. Each morning when we wake—should we choose to listen—is a message from the Creator to remember the privilege we were given of waking up. It’s a reminder to get up and prepare our self, to honor our self, to go out into the world, to connect with Mother Earth and the hearts of other beings, to inspire and encourage those who cross our paths, and most importantly, to enjoy life…

Gratitude moves stagnant energy when we’re feeling stuck in life. The simple act of practicing gratitude disrupts negative thoughts and changes our mindset to see the world in a positive way. Not only are we more attractive to others when we live in gratitude, but the most ordinary things can become extraordinary, creating a fuller, more beautiful expression of our life.

doug good feather, think indigenous: Native American spirituality for a modern world

Doug Good Feather, Think Indigenous: Native American Spirituality for a Modern World, transcribed by Doug Red Hail Pineda(Carlsbad, CA: Hay House, 2021), 27, 30, 31. As posted in the Nov 22, 2022 Daily Meditation by the Center for Action and Contemplation cac.org.

How a Surprise Question Gave Me a Great Gift

“Would you read this story to me?”

I was walking through the cafe in a Barnes and Noble bookstore during one of my wife Lisa McMann‘s recent book signings. An adult young woman sat at a table with whom I assume was her mother. When I smiled at them, the young woman pointed to the picture book in front of her and asked, “Would you read this story to me?” 

I was tempted to laugh awkwardly, nod to the woman’s mother, and continue walking. I mean, who reads a picture book to an adult stranger in the middle of a busy cafe? Not to mention that I’m normally too caught up in my busy schedule to even consider such a request, subconsciously absorbed in my own exaggerated self-importance.

But for some reason, I paused and leaned down to look at the book. I pointed to the first word, “For,” and asked the young woman if she could read it. She said no, and given her child-like manner of speaking, I guessed she was neurodivergent. Her mother murmured something in Spanish that I didn’t understand. 

I began to read. It was the story of the birth of Jesus set to T’was the Night Before Christmas. The young woman listened with rapt attention, eagerly turning the beautifully illustrated pages. 

As I read, I wondered what her mother’s life was like. Raising a dependent neurodivergent adult must bring challenges and joys that I can only imagine. When we reached the moment in the story where the angels appeared to the shepherds, I felt that the two women beside me were closer to angels than I’ll ever be. 

As the familiar words of hope, belonging, and ultimate love fell from my lips, I felt our perceived differences of gender, age, race, and neurological functioning fade away. For one sacred moment, I saw the truth—we were simply three wonderful, needy people, deeply loved by God and longing to be accepted.

When I finished the story, we exchanged farewells, and I walked away feeling like those women had given given me a far greater gift than I’d given them. 

Chance opportunities to deeply connect with others are all around us. How many have I missed, too caught up in my own fears, hopes, desires, and plans? God, help me walk through life with open eyes and an open heart. 

As you go through this holiday season, lift your head. Really see those around you. Pause. Be kind. Smile. Encourage. Remember and celebrate our shared humanity. If you do, you’ll find you receive more than you give, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

27 Simple Ways to Reduce Stress

While on book tour with my wife recently, we stopped at an elementary school for her to do an author visit. As we were walking to the gym, the wall display pictured above caught my eye. I was impressed with the quality and variety of these simple stress-busting solutions.

So if you’re feeling stressed, try some of these ideas. If you do, you might find some much needed relief, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

1. Take a warm bath

2. Use a stress toy

3. Play a game

4. Exercise your body

5. Go outside and get some fresh air

6. Dance it out

7. Notice that you’re angry

8. Fuel your body with healthy foods

9. Practice mindfulness

10. Take deep slow breaths

11. Try yoga

12. Draw or doodle

13. Talk to someone

14. Watch a funny video

15. Meditate

16. Use a warm rice bag

17. Develop a routine

18. Write three things you’re grateful for

19. Hang out with friends

20. Cuddle with an animal

21. Keep a journal

22. Use smells like lavender

23. Organize your folders or desk

24. Drink lots of water

25. Listen to music

26. Go for a walk

27. Ask for a hug

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