I was sitting on a bench at Denison College in Ohio when it happened. I had just finished my run and was waiting to walk my daughter to her play rehearsal when a loud, cheery voice called out, “Good morning! How are you?” Startled, I looked up and saw a groundskeeper in an orange vest, trash stick in hand. He was staring right at me with a big smile on his face. From the articulation of his words and some of his facial features, I realized that he was a person with an intellectual disability. I stumbled out what I hope was an appropriate response and he moved on.
As I sat on the bench and reflected on that encounter, I started asking myself some hard questions: Why aren’t I more like that? More unabashedly friendly? Why am I not that happy? If he’s the one with a disability, why is his outlook on life so positive?
Then I wondered what that groundskeeper would think if he could see inside my head. Maybe he would look at me with pity because he’d recognize how stressed I was, how I worried about the future and what other people thought of me. Maybe he would see that my perspective was bent or pick up on how slow I am to see the beauty in the small things around me. Maybe he would feel sorry for me and keep trying to brighten my day.
In that moment, I was reminded of how big an impact the attitude I choose has on my happiness. The way I decide to look at life, regardless of my circumstances, will largely determine my enjoyment of it. I’ve seen it clearly in others – some people with health, wealth, friends, and family who are stressed and bitter while others dealing with illness, poverty, and loss shine with joy and hope.
I’m not advocating denying our pain and struggles. Some of us face incredible hardships or are in a season of spirit-crushing trials. Neither “put on a happy face” or “don’t worry, be happy” is a magic elixir for contentment. But, no matter what our circumstances, we do have the ability to chose our attitude. The power to see our difficulties as insurmountable joy-killers or real opportunities for personal growth is ours to wield.
We all have challenges in life that threaten our experience of joy, things that will either make us bitter or make us better. The attitude we choose to take toward these challenges will greatly determine if we feel stressed and defeated or peaceful and hopeful. Choose well today. Be grateful. Notice beauty. Show kindness. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
It came out of nowhere. My wife and I were driving back from playing PokemonGo in a nearby park (yes, we’re still playing – it keeps us walking). A loud flapping sound started coming from the rear of the car. I pulled over and a quick check revealed the cause: a completely blown tire. We were close to home so I nursed the wounded SUV into our driveway.
After my mental reset, I began the chore with a much better attitude, thinking of myself as fortunate instead of a victim of road hazard fate. While it didn’t make changing the tire fun, it made the experience a whole lot less painful.
Later, as I was reflecting on the morning’s events, I began thinking about everything that led to that beautiful conversation. Had we not blown the tire, I wouldn’t have been in the driveway and that deeper talk probably wouldn’t have happened. If I hadn’t decided to choose gratitude over frustration, I doubt I’d have been in the right head space to share anything helpful or hopeful with my friend. Something really good would have been missed, and I would have spent my morning feeling discouraged (and perhaps not Triple B’d – Blessed By Bacon).