I hate admitting I’m weak.
Now that I am fully vaccinated, I’ve started reintroducing some normal activities that I’d put on pause during the COVID-19 pandemic – eating in restaurants, getting together with vaccinated friends, volunteering, going to the doctor and dentist, etc. It feels wonderful to engage with the world again.
It also feels exhausting. I find myself physically and emotionally drained after coming home from simple activities that I breezed through in the past. I’ve had to face the reality that extended time in isolation has left my “social engagement muscles” weak and atrophied. I’m simply not used to the crowds and stimulation.
After being so eager for so long to do exactly what I’m doing, that’s a hard admission for me. I don’t want to be that way. But I am. Like an athlete coming back from an injury, it’s going to take some time for me to rebuild the stamina that I’ve lost.
I’m working on giving myself time. Grace. Patience. It took awhile to get to this point, and it will take awhile to return from it. But it will come. My strength will return. In the meantime, the best thing I can do is be kind to myself.
So how about you? As the world shifts slowly back toward a degree of normalcy, how are you feeling? How have you changed? Whatever your answer to those questions, it’s okay. This last year has been unlike anything most of us have ever faced. None of us are coming out unscathed. We all need to heal and rebuild our strength in one way or another. Give yourself time and grace. Be kind to yourself and to others, who are likely in the same boat. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.