I often learn the most when people simply share their story.
On my lifelong journey of personal development, I’ve read a lot of books, watched a lot of videos, and listened to a lot of lectures, debates, and podcasts. While I’ve learned much from experts opinions on various topics, I often find unexpected insights when someone just talks about their life.
With the publication of my debut book series with Penguin Random House approaching (May 2023 – you can learn about it here), I gave my first author interview to an excellent blogger named Angie Azur. She asked a wide range of questions that were both insightful and fun, touching on my background, what’s most important to me, how my author wife and I work together, writing advice, and much more.
So at the risk of being self-indulgent, for this post I offer you the opportunity to read the interview. Hopefully, you’ll find it not only entertaining, but it will provide insights into who I am that will make my future posts more helpful to you on your journey toward Becoming Yourself.
For this post, I am not sharing a personal development lesson I’ve learned. Instead, I’m going to invite you to check out another aspect of my writing, one that is completely different than this blog.
In a recent post, I shared that a life-long dream came true when I got my first book deal for a spooky monster mystery series for young (and young at heart) readers called Monsterious. Now that I’m actually going to be published, I need an author website.
I am in no way a designer or a web-site builder. That said, I built my own author site and went live with it last week.
If you have a moment, it would mean the world to me if you’d visit my site mattmcmann.com and let me know what you think. You’ll find info about Monsterious, weird things I’ve done, my horrible first spooky story, and learn about my artistic family (daughter Kennedy McMann is an actor who plays Nancy Drew on the CW network show Nancy Drew, son Kilian McMann is a freelance illustrator / graphic designer, and wife Lisa McMann is New York Times and USA Today bestselling author).
If that all sounds horribly boring to you, feel free to ignore! Check back next week for another personal development post. Either way, thank you so much for taking the time to read this and for joining me on the journey to Becoming Yourself.
The holidays are not going to be normal this year. More accurately, they’re going to be worse. A lot worse. Coronavirus is robbing us of many of the things that make this season meaningful and joyful.
So how do we make the best of a bad situation? Let’s start with two things NOT to do:
1. IGNORE IT – Just put on a smile. Grin and bear it. Don’t worry be happy. Pretend everything’s great. No. It’s not great. Don’t lie to your heart. This whole situation is incredibly difficult. It’s hard and sad and lonely. Pretending it isn’t doesn’t make your pain go away; it just drives it underground where it does its damage in secret.
2. WALLOW IN IT – Everything is terrible. My life is awful. This is the worst tragedy ever. These hard times will never end. This approach is also not helpful. Things are bad, no doubt, but many people have gone through, and are going through, much worse. Choosing to marinate in negativity only serves to prolong your suffering and stunt your growth.
So ignoring and wallowing are out. What CAN we do? Here are three suggestions:
1. GRIEVE WELL – That grief you’re feeling? It’s real. In addition to whatever physical, mental, emotional, or financial knothole coronavirus has dragged you through, you may be one of the many to miss out on treasured family gatherings this year. You don’t get those back. Take fifteen minutes or an hour or a day or whatever you need to just let yourself be sad. Acknowledge your pain and disappointment. Feel your feelings. Grieve well. Then, let it go. Set your grief aside. Don’t get stuck in emotional quicksand. At some point, grieving ceases to be healthy and becomes counterproductive. Focus on the positive things in your life (you probably have a lot of them) and do something productive and enjoyable. Steer your way back toward the light.
2. HELP SOMEONE – You’re not alone in those awful feelings. A lot of other people are having them too. Deliver cookies to someone living alone. Give socks, blankets, and goodie bags to unsheltered neighbors. Donate money to your local food bank. Call your grandma. Doing something kind for someone else, even when you feel terrible, not only helps them. It will make you feel better too.
3. MAKE A PLAN – My wife and I were talking with some good friends about how hard it will be to not see our kids this Christmas. They shared how they’ve learned to make holidays alone more manageable by planning specific feel-good activities in advance. They stock up on their favorite comfort foods, map out a long walk, and create a watch list of favorite movies. My wife and I are going to borrow from their ideas this year, adding in opening presents with our kids on a group video chat.
This holiday season is going to be tough. Avoid the extremes of denying that reality or wallowing in it. Grieve well. Help someone. Make a plan. If you do, you’ll get through this storm, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
