Becoming Yourself

Developing a Better You

Tag: personal growth (Page 32 of 68)

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Feeling Guilty? Give Yourself Some Personal Development Grace

April 2, 2022 / / 5 Comments

I’d let a good thing die.

After working hard to develop a consistent routine of volunteering at our local food pantry and giving plasma, I’d stopped doing both.

It started around the holidays when things were busy. Then I got sick. Then my edits for my debut book arrived from my editor. Then I helped my wife with an extended tour for her latest novel. Then the rough draft for my second book was due.

Before I knew it, months had gone by since I’d last volunteered. While I knew in some ways the break was justified, I still felt guilty. I’d been gone for so long that the thought of going back gave me low-level anxiety. What would the other regular volunteers think or say? Not to mention that inertia had set in. Now that I’d stopped, I was less motivated to go back.

After I met my deadlines, I was out of excuses. I took the plunge and did a shift at the food pantry and gave plasma again. The anxiety I had going in disappeared after about thirty seconds. The other volunteers were happy to see me. I fell right back into my comfortable routine. It felt great to get back to giving back.

Life happens. We get busy. We lose focus. Our carefully crafted mental / emotional / spiritual / physical healthy habits get set aside. When you find yourself in that place, remember two things:

1. It’s okay.

You’re human. This is normal. Beating yourself up is not helpful to you or anyone else. Give yourself some well deserved grace.

2. Just start again.

Those routines you set aside are there waiting for you. Don’t overthink it. Pick up where you left off and keep going. You’ll be surprised how easy it is once you simply get moving.

Have any of your healthy habits fallen by the wayside? Give yourself grace. Start again. You’ll feel a renewed sense of energy and peace, and you’ll be back on the road to Becoming Yourself.

Feeling Crushed by the Weight of the World? Choose to Be Amazed

March 19, 2022 / / 2 Comments

Living in these turbulent times is difficult. A global pandemic. Economic downturn. Political division. Racial injustice. Social unrest. The collective pressure of these external stressors can feel like concrete blocks on our shoulders that we can’t seem to drop.

One simple technique that has helped me slip out from under the weight of the world is shifting my attention from the macro to the micro. Intentionally tuning in to the small and everyday instead of the huge and glaring. I’m not talking about turning a blind eye to the problems we collectively face or ignoring the responsibility to do my part to help solve them. I’m talking about balancing that view with a renewed focus on the wonder of commonplace things.

The sweet warmth of my morning tea. The beautiful deep green color of our corner houseplant. The comfortable feeling of sliding into my well-worn slippers. The way the painting on our living room wall glows in the afternoon sun. The playfulness in my wife’s smile. The mind-boggling complexity of my hand. The taste of cherry pie. Opening my mind to the simple wonders around me provides a welcome counterbalance to the heaviness of the world. It brings wholeness to my perspective.

The celebrated philosopher and theologian Abraham Joshua Heschel said it better than I ever could:

“Our goal should be to live life in radical amazement… get up in the morning and look at the world in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everything is phenomenal; everything is incredible; never treat life casually. To be spiritual is to be amazed.”

abraham joshua heschel

I make this practice part of my daily routine. In the mornings, I slip out to our balcony and spend some time in meditation, prayer, and reading. Often I’ll start by intentionally noticing a few simple things around me and letting myself be gratefully amazed by them. Before bed, I’m back on the balcony, remembering the commonplace wonders I encountered throughout the day. This simple habit is usually enough to help me begin each day with a positive attitude and end it with a healthy realignment of my perspective.

What are the everyday wonders around you? When you pause for a moment to look, what catches your eye? What awakens amazement in you? As you learn to see life with simple awe, you’ll feel the weight of the world begin to slip from your shoulders, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

This post was originally published in July of 2020.

Need Motivation? Remember Personal Development isn’t Just Personal

March 5, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Sometimes I forget that personal development isn’t just personal.

While becoming a better emotional and spiritual version of myself certainly benefits me, it also has a ripple effect. Everyone I interact with, from my closest friends and family to the checkout clerk I meet at the grocery store, is impacted by who I am and who I’m becoming.

I’m not saying I can make anyone grow or change. That power lies with each of us alone. And like you, I’m bombarded on a daily basis by bad examples of how to be human. But my personal development efforts can help me set a good example of what a healthy, growing human can look like. Though wildly imperfect, I can still be a useful guide for others to follow, as so many have done for me.

When I’m tempted to slack off on a personal development habit, be it better eating/sleeping/exercising, volunteering, nurturing meaningful relationships, spending time in prayer and meditation or sharpening my mind, I remind myself of this quote:

Be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people.

karen salmansohn

Remembering that my personal development journey is for the good of others as well as for myself often gives me the motivation I need to keep going.

So how about you? What kind of example are you setting for those around you? When people look at your life, are they inspired to become better versions of themselves? Do your words, actions, attitudes, behavior and how you spend your time, money and energy leave people discouraged by humanity or filled with hope at what an intentional person can be?

Your life gives off ripples. Everyone around you is effected. Choose simple, healthy habits for your heart, mind, body and spirit. Work them into your routine. Ask others to keep you accountable. Remember the quote above. If you do, you’ll not only enjoy a more peaceful, energized and fulfilling life, but you’ll help others do the same. And you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

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