Becoming Yourself

Developing a Better You

Tag: personal growth (Page 5 of 71)

In an Uncertain Season? Create New Labels

July 19, 2025 / / 0 Comments

I’m in a strange place. 

Recently, I’ve been struggling to define my season of life. I’ve been a full-time author for several years, publishing five books and doing lots of speaking gigs. Currently, I have no books under contract and few gigs. I’ve got various writing projects going, but with Lisa and I traveling frequently as nomads, sometimes I’m not working at all.

While I love and am grateful for this lifestyle, an unexpected side effect is feeling like I’m stuck on a threshold, betwixt and between, caught in a liminal space. I’m wrestling with not experiencing the maximum benefits of either a full-time career or full-time retirement.

As someone who prefers clarity and defined lines, this season has left me with a vague sense of unease. The uncertainty has made it hard to plan my work flow or set appropriate expectations for myself. When I’m enjoying a new travel location, I sometimes feel guilty that I’m not working. When I’m working, I often feel like I’m missing out on travel experiences. 

I’ve been ruminating on this issue. Praying about it. Talking it through with my inner circle. Here’s where I’ve landed:

1. I’m semi-retired and work part time as a writer.

2. I write thriller novels, a personal development blog, and a nomadic travel newsletter.

Our nomadic travel newsletter on Substack

While that sounds painfully obvious, I really couldn’t see it before. My season of life felt murky and undefined. Assigning these labels has given me a much needed sense of clarity, handles that I can grasp, and a place to ground my feet.

Now when I’m enjoying the perks of travel, I can do it guilt free by reminding myself that I’m semi-retired. When I’m working, I can fully engage without stress by reminding myself that I’m a part-time writer. 

These labels provide a welcome structure to my life and routine. Do they eliminate all ambiguity? No, but I’m realizing that’s okay too. Embracing a measure of uncertainty is part of the human experience and the personal development process. As author Andy Stanley would say, finding seasonal clarity is not a one-time problem to be solved but an ongoing tension to be managed.

Me with my wife Lisa enjoying our nomadic life

Are you in an uncertain season? Do you feel stuck on a threshold? Articulate your angst. Be vulnerable with trusted people. Consult your higher power (if you have one). Create clear defining labels. If you do, you’ll find a fresh measure of clarity, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

Are You Fighting AGAINST or Fighting FOR?

July 12, 2025 / / 0 Comments

Too often we think of fighting as “fighting against.” I have learned that when you “fight against” someone or some policy, that person or policy may actually be reinforced. Rather… we are called to fight for a vision that can be shared.

Simone Campbell

The above distinction struck home. 

As someone who wants to do my part to reduce suffering in the world, I realized that I often frame the struggle in terms of what I’m against vs what I’m for. I’m against people needlessly trapped by destructive habits. I’m against restricting rights for marginalized groups. I’m against unfair income inequality. Simone Campbell’s wise words made me reassess. What am I fighting for? How am I practically engaging in that fight in meaningful ways?

Here’s what I came up with:

1. I’m fighting for INDIVIDUAL healing by writing and sharing what I’m learning in this personal development blog. 

2. I’m fighting for CULTURAL healing by staying informed on important issues, voting my conscience, and advocating for others, especially marginalized groups (writing political leaders, attending rallies, etc).

3. I’m fighting for ECONOMIC healing by donating financially to organizations that effectively eradicate poverty like Heifer International. 

The reduction of suffering in the world is an issue I continually struggle with. As a straight, white, American male who is wealthy when compared to most of the world, I’m the epitome of privilege. I feel guilty at times—while some of my relatively comfortable life comes from hard work, wise choices, and practicing delayed gratification, much is the result of factors I had nothing to do with. In my desire to reduce suffering, thinking though what I’m fighting for is helpful.

What are you fighting for? What practical steps are you taking to influence that battle? Take a deep breath. Clear your mind. Clarify what you’re fighting for. Take an honest look at how you spend your time, energy, and money in that fight. If you do, you’ll find life-giving focus, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself. 

Simone Campbell, “The Shackles of Our Time,” ONEING 3, no. 1, Emancipation (2015): 38, 39. As shared in the July 5, 2025 Daily Meditation from the Center for Action and Contemplation (cac.org)

A Celtic Blessing to Lower Stress

June 28, 2025 / / 0 Comments

“Leave room in your garden for the fairies to dance.”

—attributed to artist James Temple

I honestly don’t know the original intent of this Celtic blessing, but the evocative invitation caught my attention. 

I’ve been stressed lately. The nomadic lifestyle my wife Lisa and I have been living for almost a year is wonderful and freeing, but it does have it’s downsides.

We’ve learned that “transition days” are difficult, where we wake up in one location and go to sleep in another. It involves packing, cleaning, traveling to our next place, unpacking, getting groceries, and learning the basics of the new domicile. There are dozens of little irritating questions you never think about in your own home that crop up on the road—Where are the light switches? Why aren’t there more outlets? How does the dishwasher work? Where’s the recycling?

Our recent schedule has been filled with transition days as we’ve gone from out-of-state travel to a few days at some friends’ house to three different pet sitting gigs back-to-back. I’m not complaining—the free lodging while pet sitting helps fund our travels—but it comes at a price. Walking, brushing, feeding, administering meds, play time, cleaning up messes, and dealing with behavioral challenges adds up.

The combination of closely packed transition days and caring for numerous animals has contributed to my stress. So when I read the phrase “Leave room in your garden for the fairies to dance,” here’s what it meant to me:

I need to build margin into my schedule. 

I’m a planner and derive great satisfaction from crossing things off my to do list. Reaching the end of the day with numerous things undone is a stress inducer.

What that Celtic blessing reminded me of was the need to plan for the unplanned. To add “deal with unexpected curve ball” to my list. Because those surprises come up with shocking regularity. A flat tire. An illness. Walking a stubbornly slow pet. Travel delays. If I “leave room for the fairies to dance” (a.k.a. margin) in my schedule, those stubborn interruptions will be far easier to take.

How’s your daily schedule? Is it filled to the minute? Are you feeling the stress? Plan for the unplanned. Expect the unexpected. Build in margin. Leave room for the fairies to dance. If you do, you’ll enjoy a more peaceful life, and you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

« Older posts Newer posts »

Never Miss a Post – Subscribe Here!

© 2026 Becoming Yourself

Theme by Anders Noren — Up ↑