There’s a bizarre character in the M. Night Shyamalan movie Lady in the Water. He’s a bodybuilder who only works out one half of his body. As you would suspect, he looks like a young Arnold Schwarzenegger on one side and Pee-wee Herman on the other.
I rightly laugh at that ridiculous picture, but how often have I taken the same approach in my own personal development routine? I may work hard to expand my mind but ignore my body. Or be in peak physical shape but neglect the health of my soul.
I think a foundational building block of personal development is balance. I’m not saying that every area of my life is of equal importance. For example, I’d rather be emotionally healthy with average intelligence than a depressed genius. That said, I believe working on myself as a whole will yield more satisfying results than a hit or miss approach.
So what are the areas of my life that I should be paying attention to? The answer to that question may vary depending on the person, but here are the top 5 areas that I monitor in my own life (in no particular order):
1. Physical health – eating right, regular exercise, getting enough sleep (for more see my Temple Health post here)
2. Mental health – playing brain games at lumosity.com, reading challenging material, thinking critically on important issues
3. Emotional health – watching movies, playing music, expressing creativity, taking a weekly Sabbath
4. Relational health – time with family and friends, meeting new people
5. Spiritual health – prayer, silence and solitude, time in nature, appreciating beauty
There are also what I call “second tier” areas that, while not as important as my top 5, still merit attention:
1. Financial health – giving to causes I believe in, saving for the short term & retirement, staying out of debt, enjoyment spending
2. Occupational health – having a meaningful career that I enjoy, having an appropriate work / life balance
3. Organizational health – effective time management, a balanced & sustainable schedule, a decluttered home
When I’m feeling depressed, grumpy, stressed or generally out of whack, I try to step back and do a quick mental review of these areas. It’s usually pretty easy to see which ones are out of balance and need a little TLC. Having this checklist not only helps me find a way out of my funk, it gives me a gauge to measure my progress on my personal development goals. It helps me become a better version of myself.
How about you? Which of these areas are feeling out of balance in your life? Choose one simple thing you can do in those specific areas to give them some attention. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.
I got a phone call from my sister the other day. We had a long, wide-ranging conversation about everything from the challenges of raising teenagers to how to have a relationship with God. Several times during the call, I suggested books that had helped me in a few of the areas we were discussing. She seemed genuinely interested in hearing about them.
HABITS: 
SPIRITUAL: 
MENTAL: 
SERVING: 
I was sitting on a bench at Denison College in Ohio when it happened. I had just finished my run and was waiting to walk my daughter to her play rehearsal when a loud, cheery voice called out, “Good morning! How are you?” Startled, I looked up and saw a groundskeeper in an orange vest, trash stick in hand. He was staring right at me with a big smile on his face. From the articulation of his words and some of his facial features, I realized that he was a person with an intellectual disability. I stumbled out what I hope was an appropriate response and he moved on.
As I sat on the bench and reflected on that encounter, I started asking myself some hard questions: Why aren’t I more like that? More unabashedly friendly? Why am I not that happy? If he’s the one with a disability, why is his outlook on life so positive?
In that moment, I was reminded of how big an impact the attitude I choose has on my happiness. The way I decide to look at life, regardless of my circumstances, will largely determine my enjoyment of it. I’ve seen it clearly in others – some people with health, wealth, friends, and family who are stressed and bitter while others dealing with illness, poverty, and loss shine with joy and hope.
I’m not advocating denying our pain and struggles. Some of us face incredible hardships or are in a season of spirit-crushing trials. Neither “put on a happy face” or “don’t worry, be happy” is a magic elixir for contentment. But, no matter what our circumstances, we do have the ability to chose our attitude. The power to see our difficulties as insurmountable joy-killers or real opportunities for personal growth is ours to wield.
We all have challenges in life that threaten our experience of joy, things that will either make us bitter or make us better. The attitude we choose to take toward these challenges will greatly determine if we feel stressed and defeated or peaceful and hopeful. Choose well today. Be grateful. Notice beauty. Show kindness. If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.