Developing a Better You

Tag: Walking With God

How to Connect With God: My Daily Practice

In last week’s post How to Find Direction in Life’s Fog, I wrote that, during confusing times in my life, God was my best source of “fog burning sun.” In response, a regular reader asked if I would share some of my process for how I connect with God.

Honestly, I was hesitant. While I often write about how my spiritual perspective helps me become a better version of myself, I know that some of you come from different faiths or no faith at all. I respect that, and don’t want to come across as “preachy” or forceful of my worldview. My goal is simply to share things I’ve learned on my personal development journey that may help you walk your own path, whatever path that may be.

Then I remembered something – many of the best things I’ve learned from others did not come from their insights on a particular topic, but from their sharing the ways they practice personal development in their own lives. Even if they come from a very different perspective, I almost always glean a helpful idea or tool.

So with that in mind, I decided to share a brief overview of how I approach the “how to connect with God” question. If this isn’t for you, feel free to stop reading now and check out the another post on the site or wait for next week’s installment. Still interested? Read on.

How to Connect With God

To give some context for my practices, here are some of my fundamental beliefs:

  • A loving, powerful, intelligent, eternal Higher Power exists and is the creative force behind the universe (I use the term God, but this power goes by many names).
  • God wants to be known but will not force Herself/Himself on us (God is beyond gender binaries).
  • A life-giving, intimate, conversational relationship with God is possible.

Why I believe those particular things is not the purpose of this post. That said, here is my daily process of connecting with God:

MORNING

I start the day with a five-minute stretching routine while I steep a cup of hot Tetley brand English black tea in my Harry Potter tumbler. I sit in a comfortable chair in the library corner of our apartment and begin a practice with three loosely structured parts:

Listening

For 10-15 minutes, I center myself in silence. Sometimes I close my eyes, sometimes I leave them open, depending on what feels right or how sleepy I am. Some days I let my thoughts wander. Other times, I use various meditation techniques like centering prayer, or focusing on my breathing, a word (God, love, peace, etc.) or an image (a lonely beach, a mountain meadow, a fireplace, etc.). The particular technique isn’t important. The goal here is to quiet my mind and heart to a listening posture where I’m receptive to anything God might bring to my mind.

Talking

After listening, I begin talking with God. I start with thanking God for who She/He is to me and for things I’m grateful for. Then I think about people and situations I care about and ask God to provide them with the help they need. Finally, I consider my own needs and desires and express those to God, asking for strength and guidance to live well. This usually takes about 30 minutes.

how to connect with God
My chair in our corner library

Learning

After talking with God, I read some type of spiritual writing for 10-15 minutes. I’ve read and studied the Bible for many years, but lately have been drawn to other writings such as The Diary of an Old Soul by George MacDonald (spiritual poetry about pursuing God), Walking With God by John Eldredge (was incredibly helpful for me in establishing conversational intimacy with God), and the daily emails from Richard Rohr (a Franciscan priest, author, and teacher who founded the Center for Action and Contemplation in New Mexico). After reading, I listen to a spiritually focused podcast while I run the stairwell in our apartment building for about 20 minutes. Current favorites are Another Name for Everything by Richard Rohr and The RobCast by Rob Bell.

That is the cornerstone of my connection with God routine. It usually takes about 75-90 minutes. As a writer with a flexible schedule and a 50 year old empty nester, I can take that extended time in the mornings. I’ve done some version of a Listening / Talking / Learning routine regularly for 40 years, starting with 2 minutes for each section and building gradually. This included seasons where I was in school, working day jobs with set schedules, and raising young kids. It’s definitely harder during some stretches than others, but with tenacity and a little creativity, it can be done. I believe we make time for the things we truly consider important.

AFTERNOON

Throughout the day, I try to maintain an “unstructured awareness” of God’s presence through intermittent thoughts and spontaneous, silent conversation with God while I write, run errands, do chores, watch TV, whatever. A wonderful little book that taught me this concept is The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence.

EVENING

Before bed, I stand on our balcony and talk through the day with God. Did I use it well? Accomplish what I set out to do? Learn or experience anything new? Even on hard days, I try to thank God for good things like health, relationships, a home, food, God’s presence, and meaningful work. Combined with my morning routine, these practices bookend my connection with God, providing both a positive start and a peaceful close to each day.

So there’s my personal take on how to connect with God. Take anything that may be of value to you and toss the rest. If you have questions or would like clarification or expansion on anything, please leave a comment below or email me through the “Contact” tab above. If you’re willing to leave a comment sharing how you connect with God, I’d love to read it.

Whatever road you choose, I wish you all the best on your journey toward Becoming Yourself.

My Favorite Resources for Personal Development

Personal Development: The Crossroads of Should and MustI got a phone call from my sister the other day. We had a long, wide-ranging conversation about everything from the challenges of raising teenagers to how to have a relationship with God. Several times during the call, I suggested books that had helped me in a few of the areas we were discussing. She seemed genuinely interested in hearing about them.

With that in mind, I thought I’d use this post to share some books and websites that have helped me become a better version of myself. I hope they can be an inspiration and a catalyst for growth in your own life. Here are some of my favorites in various categories:

CAREER: The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna – an easy read that uses colorful pictures and engaging graphics to communicate concepts. This book helps you find your true passions, then goes on to show how to turn them into a career by differentiating our “should do’s” from our “must do’s”.

Personal Development: Daily RitualsHABITS: Daily Rituals: How Artists Work by Mason Currey – this fascinating book is made up of short entries on the lives and daily habits of over 150 successful people from a variety of creative fields. It gave me so many useful tips on how to practically organize and live out each day for both productivity and enjoyment.

PHYSICAL: Cholesterol Clarity by Jimmy Moore – this book helped me understand the latest science on cholesterol, diet and overall heart health; kennedypm.com – a fun, engaging blog full of nutritional insight, easy recipes and beautiful photography (full disclosure – this is my daughter’s website and yes, she’s awesome 🙂 ).

Personal Development: Walking With GodSPIRITUAL: Walking With God by John Eldredge – this book helped me deepen my personal experience of God by showing how an intimate, conversational relationship with God is possible; Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis – this classic work from a master writer provides an intellectual foundation for a belief in God and a Christian worldview.

FINANCIAL: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver – this 23 minute episode on financial planning had me laughing out loud yet was the gut punch I needed to start educating myself on finances and retirement; The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey – a clear, easy to follow method for finding freedom from financial stress by one of America’s most trusted names in financial advice; Money: Master the Game by Tony Robbins – if you read Dave Ramsey and are interested in upping your financial knowledge even higher, this book is a more in depth look at investing for your future. It’s packed with interviews with the most successful investors in the world and delivered with Tony’s well known motivational style.

Personal Development: John OliverMENTAL: lumosity.com – a free website where you play fun, short games designed to exercise your brain, a key to warding off the mental decline that comes with advancing age; Words I Wish I Wrote by Robert Fulghum – a collection of moving, motivating, and thought provoking excerpts from many of the top writers in history that inspired Fulghum’s own classic “Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten”. Organized by category for easy reference, this is a gem I’ve turned to again and again to shape my thinking about life and my place in it.

Personal Development: Words I Wish I WroteSERVING: volunteermatch.org – a great website that allows you to search for volunteer opportunities in your area based on your skills and interests. I’ve used it to volunteer with a wide variety of wonderful organizations.

GIVING: charitynavigator.org – this website provides a way to give to the needs of the world with confidence by ranking charitable organizations on their financial trustworthiness and effectiveness.

I’m SO grateful for the guidance and insight these writers and resources have given me. Choose one that looks interesting to you and dive in! If you do, you’ll take another step toward Becoming Yourself.

Have any favorite resources of your own that you’d like to share? I’d love to hear about them! List them in the comments below.

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